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By James Grubel

CANBERRA, May 22 (Reuters) - Matches made over the Internet often do not last because people end up choosing unsuitable partners and forming emotional bonds before meeting face-to-face, an Australian university researcher has found.
(路透坎培拉22日電)一名澳洲大學研究員發現,網路配對通常無法使雙方的關係持久,因為在面對面相見之前,人們就會選定不適合的伴侶,並形成情感連結。

Women were especially susceptible to finding Mr. Wrong, as they tend to be attracted by witty comments or clever emails, said psychologist Matthew Bambling from the Queensland University of Technology.
昆士蘭科技大學(Queensland University of Technology)心理學家班伯林(Matthew Bambling)說,女性特別容易因此找到不對的人,因為她們易於被機智的話語和聰明伶俐的電子郵件所吸引。

"You can never assume things are the way they seem online," Bambling told Reuters on Thursday.
班伯林星期四向「路透」表示:「你絕對無法假定實情會如網路上所呈現的模樣。」

"Just because they can write a clever comment or a witty email, doesn't mean they will be Mr. Right, that's for sure," he said,
adding some men use the concept of "netting", sending emails to dozens of women and hoping one might respond.
他說:「只因他們寫下機敏的話語或風趣詼諧的電郵,不代表他們就是你要找的對象。那是確定的。」加上有些男人利用"灑網"概念,寄電子郵件給數十位女性並期待其中有人會回應。

Bambling said you can find a partner online, but warned those using the Web to find love to be aware of the pitfalls.
班伯林說,透過網路找伴侶可以,但他警告要注意其中的圈套

"There's definitely a dis-inhibition affect online," he said, with people more likely to exaggerate their good points while hiding anything negative.
他說,「網路上絕對有去抑效應(註1)」,因為人總是較可能誇大自己的優點,隱藏自己的缺點。

"Few guys for example would say 'look, I'm a middle aged alcoholic who's been married five times, pick me'. They're going to present themselves as a good catch."
譬如說,不會有人說:「我是個嗜酒且結了五次婚的中年人,選我吧!」

He said it was easy for people to quickly invest too much emotionally in an online relationship because they don't see the full picture of the person they are emailing.
他說,對於一般人而言,在網路關係裡情感性地投入是很快的,因為他們無法全面性的看到這個他們正在電郵交往的人。

He said some people can also become addicted to the rush of replies they receive on dating websites, which can lead to future disappointment.
他說,有些人也會沉溺於在交友網站上所收到的回應。

Bambling said people can avoid many of the problems by meeting early in the virtual relationship, rather than by getting to know each other only by email.
班伯林說,人們可以在網路虛擬關係的早期就安排見面,如此一來就可避免許多問題,而非只靠電郵瞭解彼此。

He suggests couples arrange to meet over coffee after a few emails, which will help people from building up a fantasy image of their match.
他建議,在幾封建立良好速配關係的電郵後就應該要安排見面喝個咖啡。

"The main thing to remember is to make real life contact as soon as possible if you are to interested in someone, because then you will know if a relationship is a possibility," he said.
他說,「記得,如果你對對方有意,應該要儘快見面,因為到時候就會明白這段關係能否建立。」

(Editing by Miral Fahmy)
翻譯:中央社與自己

註1:
「去抑效應」disinhibition effect:指人在社會本已學會自我抑制,但如果社會法制鬆弛,對酗酒、吸毒、破壞公物不加制止及懲罰,則犯罪行為必然增加,就對犯罪者而言就是「去抑」或"去抑效應"。

特定的行為本身並不是從楷模上學習的,模仿能奏效的第二個步驟,是這個行為舉動早在以前就經由其他管道學習到了,例如觀看電視上的暴力是加強了犯罪或侵略傾向,降低了對他人施暴的自我抑制能力。

因此,大部分電視暴力研究的假設:人們會以自己的暴力方式呈現,而非媒體上的模式。而思考的過程與反應的性質與時間是可以經由媒體訓練的,如電動遊戲裡『先射再想』的反應模式,轉移至現實生活的真槍射擊。

題目:嘉寶看到朋友飆車被同儕視為英雄 因而加入飆車活動---->「去抑效應」

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